Getting Unstuck For A New Year

By John Stallings


In the movie, “Forest Gump” you may remember the part of the movie where Forest decides to go for a run.

He first runs to the end of the driveway. Then he runs into town. Then he runs to the county line & then he runs to the state line. Then he runs across half the United States to Santa Monica California.

Then Forest decides to turn around & run some more. This time he runs across the country to a lighthouse in Maine. He keeps running until people notice. He’s in the media, on magazine covers & starts to build a following. People start to run with him & follow him wherever he goes.With a full beard & dirty, grungy clothes, Forest finds himself with a large number of followers who will go wherever he goes.

One day, Forest stops running. Standing in the middle of a road he speaks to his followers. They wait with bated breath for his words of wisdom. They lean toward him waiting for the words to fall from his lips.Forest speaks like no man ever spoke before, sharing these words of unprecedented wisdom, I hope you’re sitting because this is big; Forest says, “I’m kind of tired. I think I’m gonna go home now.” He walks through his followers who part like the Red Sea.

Though the movie was first & foremost a comedy, I think, & certainly it was just a movie, there’s something here that rings a serious bell. You can’t help but feel sorry for these people following Forest, mostly because they have nothing better to do. They have no direction in their lives. These folk put their faith & hope in Forest & he has nothing to offer them.

WE HAVE A GUIDE

As we embark on the year 2012, we aren’t like the people in the movie Forest Gump, - so empty, - so lost -that we would follow someone who’s going nowhere in particular. Forest had a good heart, but really had no clue where he was going & why. We’re told in scripture & we know experientially that the Holy Spirit who resides within us will Guide us into all truth. We have God, His Son Jesus & The Holy Spirit to fill our lives with meaning & give us guidance.

STUCK

The greatest challenge of the coming New Year will be letting go of the past in order to grasp a new future. It’s not as easy as it sounds because we as human beings have a way of getting stuck. Many people find that though they want passionately to believe things can be different, a new beginning always seems to move just out of reach. They find themselves slipping back into the bondage of the past.In Philippians 3:13-14 Paul said….

but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind & reaching forth for those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

If you saw the movie Groundhog Day; you have a perfect example of a man who’s stuck, living the same day over & over. I don’t think there is anyone who isn’t, or hasn’t been stuck. Maybe our “stuckness” centers on a tangible such as buying, eating, drinking, drugging, worrying, fretting, gambling, risks, sex, love, books, movies, television, ideas, work, or power. Or maybe what we’re experiencing is a general malaise or vertigo that we can’t put our finger on.

Being stuck is sort of a twilight zone of sameness with no seeming ability to affect any kind of change. We yearn for new vistas but seem to be fresh out of ideas as to how and where to find them. We look down the road and see no chance of anything but more of the same.

We all know what it’s like to be in a car that’s stuck, either in snow, sand or mud. My heart bled these past few weeks as I watched the folk in the northeastern states being victimized by the white stuff.Though we love white Christmases, too much of a good thing can be devastating.

But being emotionally and spiritually stuck is worse. It’s the realization that we’re not moving forward, and we feel paralyzed. There are projects we know we need to start or finish, but we’re seemingly trapped and frozen in place.

Few of us will grow in our Christian lives in a steady, gradual, upward slope from birth to death. Granted there will be seasons of seemingly effortless growth but there will also be seasons where we somehow get “stuck” at one level and can’t “break out” to the next level.Something’s getting in the way!It's my contention that part of what impedes our personal and spiritual growth are the "stuck" places in our life.

There are varieties of reasons we get stuck but whatever they might be, our personal growth diminishes the longer we remain stuck. We can get stuck in our past, in our pain, in our problems, in our perspectives or in our life patterns.I get stuck sometimes, don’t you? It is not usually an absence of options, but a plethora of them. One gets stuck in the process of choosing & then shuts down.We can sometimes get stymied. That implies being thwarted by some outside force.

Certainly outside forces influence us negatively or positively, but the reality is that most of the stymieing comes from within. We are afraid. We are afraid of the shame, embarrassment, & disappointment that failure will bring & the increased responsibility of success. Therefore, we are timid, tenuous, and terrorized by fear of the decisions we might make or actions we might take. After all, we might make a mistake. We might produce mediocre work. We might open a can of worms. Our "mights take away our might.”

Maybe a large challenge comes up, -we get discouraged & we freeze. We put our plans on hold & break our pattern of discipline.Sometimes “being stuck” is a signal that something has gone wrong; somehow we’ve missed it, and we’re terribly off course. This is not always the case; as a matter of fact, feeling stuck is a condition that can be good for us. For one thing, a prime prerequisite for getting unstuck is to be stuck. When we’re stuck, we’ve lost our momentum and are forced, at least temporarily, to stop and assess our lives.

Feeling stuck acts as an inward summons or call. We face the fact that we are dissatisfied with where we are. We see the utter futility of our situation, and, if we are wise, we reach for another level to satisfy the desire for change. At that point, we are reaching for that which really satisfies, and, in so doing, we are calling out for God. So that’s why I say that being stuck isn’t really a bad thing. What has happened is, because of the stuck feelings, we have begun to readjust our lives, looking for a clearer perspective. In a way we are calling out, “What’s next for me, God?

PEOPLE GET STUCK IN THE PAST

Some people live in the past and seem to revel in the hurts of yesterday. They won’t shake loose from their past failures or calamities because, to them, the past is more important than the present. When you talk to them, you quickly see they are totally caught up with & committed to keeping the past more real than the present. They are stuck. What decade was it that Ronnie Millsap was lost in? Was it the sixties? I liked the song but always forget the decade. Oh well, it matters not; the important things is he was stuck.

In John 5, Jesus saw a man sitting beside the pool of Bethesda. He had been sitting there for thirty-eight years, trying to be first into the water after it was troubled by the angel. Jesus came along and heard the man’s story and immediately saw that he was stuck. I would say that thirty-eight years of sitting in the same spot, whining about the same problem is really being stuck. It didn’t cross the man’s mind that there was another way. When Jesus was able to get him to quit worrying about his past defeats and disappointments & look to Him, the man was healed, & he carried his bed away.

WE CAN GET STUCK IN OLD PATTERNS AND HABITS.

It’s not hard to develop bad habits (sometimes sinful), but more often people are just bogged in ruts. Some give up, figuring they can’t change, so why try? Perhaps because of resentment or a negative thought pattern they’ve been in so long, they think their situation could never change. Perhaps they’ve come to believe their lot in life is already static, & nothing can ever be different.

MAYBE YOU’RE STUCK FINANCIALLY OR WITH SOME OTHER PHYSICAL NEED.

In John 2, Jesus attended a wedding in Cana of Galilee, & they had run out of wine. The people were stuck with no libation, & obviously it put the wedding planners in a bit of an embarrassing spot. They were stuck with no wine. Though Jesus’ time had not yet come to do miracles, He responded to the need & performed His first miracle by turning water into wine. When we are stuck financially, emotionally, or in any other way, we should immediately turn to Jesus, knowing He’ll always be responsive to our needs.

YOU MAY BE STUCK WITH A FALSE ASSUMPTION

In Joel 2:23-32, the prophet speaks to a people who are stuck in despair, feeling things will never get better. He tells them to look up and be glad for God is going to do great things for them. They have a great future if they’ll rise up and take hold of it by faith.He says in verse 25,-

-And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten, the , and the caterpillar, and the , my great army which I sent among you. 26And ye shall eat in plenty, and be satisfied, and praise the name of the LORD your God, that hath dealt wondrously with you: and my people shall never be ashamed. 27And ye shall know that I am in the midst of Israel and that I am the LORD your God, and none else: and my people shall never be ashamed.28And it shall come to pass afterward, that I will pour out my spirit upon all flesh; and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, your old men shall dream dreams, your young men shall see visions.

In I Kings 17 we read the story of Elijah being sent to the home of the widow of Zarephath. A famine was in progress, & the only thing she had was just enough meal to make a cake for herself & her son, then die of slow starvation. This poor little widow woman was indeed stuck. Elijah asked her to make him a little cake first, and at that point she had a choice. She could believe the word of the man of God or do it her way, & no doubt die. When she opted to obey, she was given a miracle supply of oil & meal that lasted for many days.

When things are going bad & we are stuck in some situation or other, we should always listen for Gods voice. He’ll have a plan to get us unstuck. [He has a fleet of spiritual tow-trucks that can be on your case before you can say “Gesundheit”.] The only thing the widow had to do was exercise obedience, & her need was met. To get unstuck, you & I will often have to make that same choice--to obey God.


SOMETIMES BEING STUCK IS JUST PURE PROCRASTINATION.

We develop a habit of putting things off until it finally turns into resistance to tasks that are unpleasant to us. Though we don’t enjoy thinking about it, sometimes we can become stubborn, which started as a childhood-survival technique we may have developed to ward off controlling people. We learned early that we can resist certain things, & people can do nothing but accept our resistance. Perhaps we even enjoyed seeing how it frustrated others when we used those powers of resistance. This may have worked as a child, but it isn’t necessary now, and if we don’t recognize what’s happening, it can be a tool of the devil to sabotage our motivation. Now it translates to pure, old, mule-headed stubbornness, keeping us from the changes we should make.

MAYBE WE ARE STUCK BECAUSE WE ARE RESISTING CHANGE.

Are you stuck at the beginning of the great New Year, 2012?

HERE ARE A FEW HELPFUL HINTS FOR GETTING UNSTUCK.

1. Look at your situation realistically. Does anything in the aforementioned apply? Ask God to help you see what’s really stopping your progress.

2. Look for the bottlenecks in your situation & address them.

3. Develop a “what’s next” mentality. God will show you His will if you seek Him.

4. Don’t hesitate to go to people you respect & enlist their prayers & advice. Don’t forget to seek God.

5. When you get temporarily stuck on a project, walk away for a while, & you’ll come back to it with a new perspective. But do come back.

6. Home run king, Henry Aaron, had this advice: In a slump, keep swinging.

7. Help others with their problems, & yours will seem smaller.

8. Take care of yourself spiritually, emotionally, & physically.

9. Start each day with God’s Word & a prayer for guidance.

LET ME GIVE YOU A LIST OF IMPORTANT QUESTIONS FOR THE NEW YEAR

1. What’s the most humanly impossible thing you’ll ask God to do for you this coming year?

2. What’s the single most important thing you need to happen to improve the spiritual quality of your family?

3. What spiritual discipline do you most want to make progress in & what will you do about it?

4. What’s the biggest time-waster in your life & what will you do about it in the coming year?

5. For whose salvation will you most fervently pray in the coming year?

6. How could you improve your prayer life in 2012?

7. What will you do in 2012 that will matter most in 10 years? In eternity?

8. What will you do differently by God’s grace this coming year?

9. What’s the most important decision you need to make in 2012?

10. What area of your life needs simplifying & how will you do it?

11. What important need do you feel burdened to meet in 2012?

12. What habit would you like to establish in 2012?

13. Who do you most want to encourage this year?

14. What’s the most important financial goal you need to meet & how will you go about doing it?

15. How can you improve the quality of your work life?

16. What will you endeavor to do to bless your pastor or others who minister to you?

17. What book in addition to the bible do you want to read?

18. What’s your biggest regret of 20111 & what will you do about it in 2012?

19. What important trip would you want to take this year?

20. What skill do you want to learn or improve?

21. To what need or ministry will you give to in an unprecedented way in 2012?

22. What biblical doctrine do you want to better understand?

23. If those who know you best gave you advice, what advice would that be?

24. Would they be right?

25. What will you do about it?You are looking for ways to make progress in your life. If you weren’t, you wouldn’t have read these little tips by such a non-expert as I.

If we keep reaching, the best is yet to come.

In Saskatchewan there’s a sign by the side of a muddy road which reads:

CHOOSE YOUR RUT CAREFULLY, YOU’LL BE IN IT A LONG TIME.

Happy New Year,


Blessings,


John

Special Comments!!

Dear reader,

I regret the fact that it’s been so long since I posted a new blog. A little over a week ago my wife Juda tripped and fell in a Cracker Barrel parking lot sustaining a rather bad break in her right arm [her dominate arm] and cracks in her left hand and wrist. We’re talking about a lady with a cast on one arm and the other arm in a sling.

Welcome to the world of “Juda can’t do much of anything,” and  “John is doing most everything, much of which he doesn’t know how to do.” But I’m learning fast.

We’ve had some help but I’ve been doing the Lion’s share of the work. As I’ve always said about babies, they’re not “a lot of trouble,” but they do need “lots of care.” Of course Juda isn’t a baby but at a time like this the same goes for a spouse who’s incapacitated. This has left me little time to write but I’ll have a new message up and posted in a day or two.

We are fine and Juda is feeling better and we have every reason to believe she’ll be as good as new in a week or so. We covet your prayers that my lovely wife will continue to experience a speedy recovery.

Watch for my new post-It may come as early as tonight.

Blessings,

John

Move To Praise Avenue!!

By John Stallings


It is with pleasure that I tell you that I represent Glory Realtors Inc., an exciting investment opportunity.

Let me quickly confess that I haven’t always lived there but have visited enough to honestly be able to present it to you as a wonderful place to live.

I am trying to persuade as many people as possible to buy property on Praise Avenue. I don’t know where you live now but it would be safe to say many of you live in exclusive residential areas. Maybe you live on,

 Complain Court,

Lamentation lane,

Grumble Gables,

or Barely Getting by Boulevard, down at the end of the street, next to

 Ain’t It Awful Ally.

 However, I’m asking you to pack up, sell out, and move to Praise Avenue.

“Why should I do that? You ask. Good question. When an intelligent person decides to relocate, he does it for good reasons, so let me give you several reasons to make this move.

REASON #1:

WE ARE COUNSELED BY GOD’S WORD TO LIVE ON PRAISE AVENUE.

Psalm 135:1 says, “Praise ye the Lord. Praise ye the name of the Lord; praise him O ye servants of the Lord.”

Psalm 106:1 says, “Praise ye the Lord. O give thanks to the Lord; for he is good; for his mercy endureth forever.

Psalm 103:1 says, “Bless the Lord, O my soul; and all that is within me bless his holy name.”

Psalm 100:4 says, “Enter into his gates with thanksgiving and into his courts with praise.”

Many other places in Gods word implore us to live on Praise Avenue.

Psalm 96:1-6 tells us; “Sing unto the Lord a new song all the earth. Sing unto the Lord, bless his name; show forth his salvation from day to day. Declare his glory among the heathen, his wonders among all people; For the Lord is great, and greatly to be praised. He is to be feared above all Gods. For all the gods of the world are; but the Lord made the heavens. Honor and majesty are before him: strength and beauty are in his sanctuary.”


REASON #2:

SOMEONE WHO WE SUPREMELY LOVE WANTS US TO LIVE ON PRAISE AVENUE.

When you love someone, you are always looking for ways to please them. You will have a keen listening ear to each and every suggestion because you know that some special day such as a birthday or Christmas is coming up and you don’t want to miss an opportunity to please the one you love. If you catch the slightest hint, you will file it away until you can fulfill that desire.

Some people are terribly hard to please, but look how easy our God has made it for us. He has plainly told us that He craves our love and praise so much that if we build him a house of praise He’ll be quick to inhabit it. To be frank, the very reason He created us was so that the creature could praise the creator. When a child climbs in his fathers lap and gives him love, the father receives great joy from it. Likewise our God receives genuine pleasure when we respond to His love for us with expressions of worship and praise.


REASON #3:

WE WILL GREATLY BENEFIT FROM THE MOVE TO PRAISE AVENUE.

Nothing blesses us in every way more than praise does. Note that God is always seeking to do us, His children good. A close investigation of all Gods commandments will prove that they are all designed for our benefit. If you feel that God isn’t answering your prayers, maybe you could make a change and start mingling more praise with your petitions and see what happens. When you and I start to recognize the goodness and mercies of God He will then start to consider our wants and needs more. Praise benefits us in another way, in that it will always make the devil run.

Have you ever noticed that if you are talking to a person about someone they don’t have much affection for, the more you say positive about that person, the more uncomfortable the person is who doesn’t like them. If you don’t stop building that person up, you’ll soon lose your audience. That’s what praise does to Satan. He so despises God that he won’t be around long when we start to praise the Lord.

REASON #4:

THE LANDLORD ON PRAISE AVENUE WILL KEEP US SAFE AT ALL TIMES.

As soon as you make the move to praise avenue, you’ll get a protection policy, not that you’ll never have a problem, but that God will always go through it with you. Someone might ask; if I already have problems and a move to praise avenue won’t guarantee no problems, why should I move? The answer is simple. If we try to solve life’s problems by ourselves, we are sure to end up in trouble. But if we live on Praise Avenue, God will fight our battles for us. The bottom line is; without praise, life will sooner or later become too much for us.

Think about how faithful God has always been to wake you in the morning as well as sustain, protect and provide for you with such regularity. Think how he’s blessed you with sight, hearing, and the ability to move around and enjoy life. If you saw the movie The Passion, it reminded you of what Jesus went through to purchase our salvation.


Should we not sing with the songwriter?

MERCY THERE WAS GREAT AND GRACE WAS FREE.
PARDON THERE WAS MULTIPLIED TO ME,
THERE MY BURDENED SOUL FOUND LIBERTY,
AT CALVARY.

REASON #5:

MOVING TO PRAISE AVENUE WILL EXPRESS OUR FAITH IN GOD.

Our ability to burst into praise regardless of the circumstances is truly a measure of the quality and quantity of our faith in God. If we believe that God is both willing and able to do “exceedingly abundantly above all we could ask or think,” if we believe that our lives are in his care, if we really believe that nothing comes to us except what in His providence He allows, why would we not praise him in bad times as well as good?

As the old song goes, “anyone can sing when the suns shining bright, but you need a song in your heart at night.”

When you live on praise Avenue, you may be “troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted but not forsaken; cast down but not destroyed.” 2 Corinthians 4:8-9.

You see, even in the darkest circumstances, we can praise God because we know that all things are not good, but “all things work together for good to them that love God. “Romans 8:28. When we believe Him, we turn everything over to Him and praise Him for whatever he does.

Some well known Old Testament residents of Praise Avenue are Jehoshaphat and his army, who were surrounded by three hostile armies. The story says, “Then Jehoshaphat appointed singers unto the Lord and that should praise the beauty of holiness as they went out before the army, and to say “ Praise the Lord; for his mercy endureth forever.” 2 Chronicles 20:19-21.

Notice that Jehoshaphat put his full trust in the word of the Lord, not stationing the praisers behind the army where they’d have some measure of protection. No, they were stationed before the army relying on the fact that their praises would be suitable habitation for an all-powerful God who would fight their battle for them.

Two well known New Testament occupants of Praise Avenue are Paul and Silas. They had been thrown in jail in Philippi on trumped up charges. They had been flogged and their backs were sore and swollen. Their feet were in hard, brutal stocks. Every movement added more pain. By all rights they’d have been complaining but they weren’t. Instead they decided to praise God. And God, the mighty deliverer responded to those praises. The record says that suddenly a great earthquake came and the foundations of the prison were shaken; and immediately all the doors were opened and everyone’s hands were loosed. Hallelujah!!!

The fact that God shows up when we praise is a good reason to keep praising, isn’t it?

REASON #6:

LIVING ON PRAISE AVENUE WILL ALLOW US TO PRACTICE FOR HEAVENS CHIEF ACTIVITY.

You can read Revelation 5:11-14 and Revelation 19 for a lifestyle of the redeemed as pictured by John the Revelator. In Revelation 5:11-13 John gets a glimpse on the inside of heaven and paints a word picture of a glorious service in heaven. He says;

“And I beheld, and I heard the voice of many angels round about the throne, and the beasts, and the elders; and the number of them was ten thousand times ten thousand and thousands of thousands, saying with a loud voice, Worthy is the Lamb that was slain to receive power, and riches, and wisdom and strength and honor and glory and blessing. And every creature that was in heaven, and on the earth and under the earth, and such as are in the sea and all that are in them, heard I saying, Blessing and honor and glory be unto him that sitteth upon the throne, and unto the Lamb forever and ever.” Hallelujah!!!

I don’t know how many trillions that is but let’s say that John saw more angels praising God than our minds can comprehend.

Aren’t you glad that this old world isn’t our home; we’re just pilgrims passing through. We have got a lot to look forward to because according to John, we’ll join the saints of all the ages and engage in Praising God throughout the ceaseless ages of eternity.

So I’ll tell you what. In the light of all we’ve said, I have decided to move to praise Avenue and I’m inviting all of you to move with me. Regardless of our problems, let us praise the Lord.

God forbid, but if you sprain your ankle, praise him that he’s Jehovah Rophe, the mighty healer.

God forbid, but if you are dead broke, and the bills are high, and funds low, praise God he’s Jehovah Jireh, our provider.

God forbid, but if your spouse runs out on you or your children turn their backs on you, praise God he’s Jehovah Shammah and he’ll never leave you or forsake you.

God forbid, but if one day the devil, the accuser of the brethren, mounts a massive offensive against you and you feel your filthy rag of righteousness is filthier than ever, praise God that Jehovah Tsidkenu is only a prayer away and is eager to cover you with his robe of righteousness.

Have you ever noticed that the last five Psalms start with the words, “Praise ye the Lord?”
Reading these Psalms gives us the principles for improving the emotional landscape of our minds and the attitude structure of our hearts, so that we may have a blessed and happy life. The One-hundred fiftieth Psalm says;

PRAISE GOD IN HIS SANCTUARY,
PRAISE HIM IN THE FIRMAMENT OF HIS POWER,
PRAISE HIM FOR HIS MIGHTY ACTS,
PRAISE HIM ACCORDING TO HIS ABUNDANT GREATNESS,
PRAISE HIM WITH THE BLAST OF THE HORN,
PRAISE HIM WITH THE PSALTERY AND HARP,
PRAISE HIM WITH THE TIMBREL AND DANCE,
PRAISE HIM WITH STRINGED INSTRUMENTS AND PIPE,
PRAISE HIM WITH LOUD-SOUNDING CYMBALS,
PRAISE HIM WITH CLANGING CYMBALS;
LET EVERY THING THAT HATH BREATH PRAISE THE LORD,
HALLELUJAH.


I IMPLORE YOU, AS I AM DOING, TO MAKE THE PERMINENT MOVE TO PRAISE AVENUE SO THAT WE CAN,

…. “BLESS THE LORD AT ALL TIMES AND LET HIS PRAISE BE CONTINUALLY BE IN OUR MOUTHS.” Psalm 34:1.

Blessings,

John

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!

Offended Christians

By John Stallings

…..Love is not touchy. 1 Corinthians 13: 5-- J.B Philips translation


What’s the devil’s most deadly & deceptive trap?

What tool of Satan imprisons countless Christians, severs relationships, widens existing breaches between people in families & churches--& is a leading cause of disunity? It’s the trap of offense.

Offense is described as-“an act causing anger, hurt feelings, resentment, displeasure, or an affront.”

If caught in its early stages it can be dealt with before much damage is done but the deeper the offense & the longer it’s allowed to fester, the greater the chance that it will turn into a poisonous root of bitterness & bury itself deep within the soul. The result will be a harden heart against people & ultimately God Himself.

When an offense becomes a stronghold, an individual will develop a pattern through which all incoming information gets processed & then they start filtering everything through past hurts, rejections & past injuries.

Offended people feel justified in withholding forgiveness from the offender.
Offended people feel justified in gossiping to others about the offense.
Offended people feel justified in enlisting sympathizers in their cause & turning other people against the offender.
Offended people will produce much fruit, namely; anger, outrage, jealousy, resentment, strife, bitterness, hatred, envy & broken relationships.
Offended people often don’t know they’ve fallen into the offense trap.
Offended people feel; “I was mistreated or misjudged—therefore I’m justified in my behavior.”


Very often offended Christians [or Christians so-called] will refuse to be a part any longer of the Christian community. The people with whom they meet & rub shoulders are other offended folk. Sunday to them becomes a day for sleeping late or visiting relatives & friends or a day at the beach.

It’s not uncommon for these offended Christians to give up Bible reading & Bible study & God becomes a relic of their past, although they are known to continue to talk religious & carry a strong attitude of self-righteousness. The justification for the dismissal of God from their lives is that they’ve been hurt somewhere along the way & there are “too many hypocrites in the church.” This argument is simply an evasive tactic to justify one’s negative feelings toward others & of God Himself.

Satan knows how easy it is for all of us to hold on to grudges & he does everything in his power to remind us of the injustices done to us, real or imaginary. He knows that if he can get us to allow unforgiveness to remain in our hearts it gives him a foothold.

People get offended by the words or actions of others, & often sermons. They feel every sermon is intentionally aimed at them. They might say; “no one spoke to me, the pastor shook my hand but his eyes were on another person.” We all are presented with tons of opportunities to get offended every single second of our lives.

People who become offended in a church, usually move on to another church. Since they never deal with their spirit of offense, they keep moving around looking for a perfect church; a church that will never hurt their feelings. The truth of the matter is there is no such thing as a church that will never hurt our feelings.

CONSIDER THE LOWLY PORCUPINE

If you’re walking through the woods & you hear a rattling sound, step lightly. It could be a deadly rattlesnake- but you could also be in the proximity of a rodent called the porcupine.

The adult porcupine is about three feet long & weighs between 20 & 30 pounds. It’s known to rustle its quills to warn a potential predator to back off. In a worse case scenario [small animals such as dogs usually get the worst injuries] you could end up trying to pull out a bunch of barbed quills. The porcupines don’t have to aim perfectly either because they have on average 30,000 quills to throw, with fish-hook like barbs in them, located all over their bodies except their faces. [Thanks Wikipedia.]

When threatened the porcupine attacks by moving backward or sideways into the aggressor & the quills lodge in the aggressor’s skin. Every time the pierced victim moves, the quills penetrate further into its body. If the quills pierce vital organs the victim can die.

HAVE YOU NOTICED THERE ARE PORCUPINE PEOPLE?

We’ve all taken some quills along the way & to be truthful we’ve all thrown a few quills. There are some people who- through the look on their face & their body language seem to be saying,-“You take a chance if you mess with me. I have plenty of quills & I won’t hesitate to use them.” These “quill throwers” are raspy & harsh & if you have even the shortest of encounters with them you will doubtless come away carrying quills.

We meet “quill throwers” in all levels of life. They are in hospitals, doctor’s offices, schools, restaurants, department stores, driving down hi-ways & even in churches. You probably have one or two in your extended family.

Not only are there “Quill throwers,” there are also “Quill carriers.” If you’ve ever seen a church fight or for that matter a family feud you are aware of this. Quill carriers are folk who’ve taken some quills in life & have never gotten rid of them. Many times it’s because they don’t want to be healed. They savor the pain caused by quills.

GOD'S WORD SPEAKS TO THE PORCUPINE PROBLEM

In 1 Peter 4: there is what some call “The Peter Prescription.” Verse 8 says;--Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.

Notice Peter says—ABOVE ALL-love each other deeply. ……This is a biblical mandate! It means make every effort, -- go all out—make it priority one—love as if your life depended on it.

It may be painful to hear but the main reason we are super-bothered by others & the quills they throw at us is simple; we just don’t have the “love covering” we need to absorb the hurt & lighten up about the barbs thrown at us.

Notice Peter doesn’t say love covers-up sins, but love covers-over a multitude of sins.
When we don’t forgive others who trespass against us, or hit us with quills, the reason is—there’s not enough love to “cover it over.” Again…Love covers over a multitude of sins.

Love gets a little confusing because we mean all kinds of different things when we talk about love. I love to fish & I love chocolate ice cream however I have a much deeper commitment to my wife than I do those things. But I use the same word, love.

In the church we’re always saying-God is love-therefore we should love too but what do we mean when we say that? When we step out of the spiritual realm we have Hollywood & T.V presenting movies about love like Sleepless in Seattle, You’ve got mail, Titanic, Friends, & Dawson’s Creek. These things can’t help but affect us, & some of our expectations grow out of watching them. Harlequin Romance Magazines sells 130 million books each year; books purporting to tell us about love. Some of it might be good & some of it bad so it’s important that we understand what we’re really talking about when we speak of love.

In 1 Corinthians, Paul wrote to a church that had all the spiritual gifts but they argued constantly. They had asserted how smart & gifted they were & so Paul had been critiquing this complicated & conflicted Corinthian church. The Love chapter, 1 Corinthians 13 comes as almost an intrusion in the flow of the letter. Paul took great care to explain to them that though they had all these phenomenal gifts, anything minus love equals nothing. Zero.

When we think of love in the way the world presents it we’re usually talking about romantic love which is based on physical desirability. This love assumes that the loved- one is attractive & it assumes incredible emotional intensity so that one can’t help but pursue the loved one. But this is a far cry from what Paul is talking about because he writes love is more than an emotion. It’s capable of even loving the unlovable.

Sometimes when we use the word love we’re speaking of tolerance; you do your thing & I’ll do mine. Tolerance is good but it’s not the kind of love Paul is talking about. Sometimes love will compel us to be intolerant & demand change in an individual. Sometimes love will have to be tough, as in intervening in the life of a loved one who’s bound by drugs or other substances. It’s clear that tolerance isn’t the kind of love Paul’s talking about.

Sometimes love will be used as a cause; we love the environment so we wear wrist- bands & T-shirts to protest things that hurt the environment, but this isn’t the love Paul is talking about. Some of the meanest people in the world parade behind the banner of love for this or that cause & in crusading for tolerance; they can be so intolerant they’re downright dangerous. John Lennon wrote a song called “Give peace a chance,” & all the time he was at war with the Beatles. Their personal relationships were in shambles & they were calling the world to peace. Like the man who said, “I love mankind- its people I hate.”

The love Paul speaks about isn’t even friendship. Sometimes people will get sentimental & feel they have so much in common with an individual that they’ll say, “I love you.” There might even be an awkward hug & a few tears because the friendship touches them in such a way as to be thought of as love. Like two drunks in a bar who get a little lubricated & say, “I love you, man.” This isn’t the kind of love Paul is talking about.

As a matter of fact Paul isn’t going to let us guess what he’s talking about, he gets very concrete about love. He says love is patient. It can relax in the present. Love is willing to accept slow change & to try again. Love is patient & kind. Love is warm & sympathetic. It sees & feels the difficulties of the other person. It’s not cold & analytical. Love is kind & doesn’t envy. Love doesn’t boast & isn’t proud. Love avoids abrasive & inflammatory language. Love listens. Love is a dialogue. Love doesn’t scold a person like they were a family pet. Love isn’t easily angered. Love is more than biting the tongue; it works at the inner core of us.

Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes & perseveres. Love is constantly hoping for change in people & doesn’t give up after one good try. Love is going to try & try & try again. Love isn’t what celebrities talk about on The Oprah Show.

Have you ever thought about the fact that right in the middle of the happy, romantic & love-filled marriage vows we start talking about better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness & in health? Just when we’re speaking of this feel-good love, we imagine those terrible scenarios. Why do we do that? It’s because deep inside we all want love that is secure. Deep down we know there is real, all embracing love. We want that love for ourselves & we want to be able to give it too. And so there it is in the vows- in the marriage ceremony.

But keep in mind; the love Paul speaks about is bigger than married love because he’s not talking to married couples. He’s talking to the church & he’s telling them this is the kind of loving relationships they should have. It’s the kind of love God loves us with.

FORGIVING THE QUILL THROWERS

These next words will be some of the most important words you’ll ever read because if you & I don’t get this thing called forgiveness right, we’ll miss the heart of the gospel. I am swinging this axe with great humility because I find forgiveness such a struggle. More than once in my life I’ve had people I trusted to prove unworthy of that trust by doing everything in their power to hurt me. As you know these kinds of people almost never ask forgiveness. But even in cases where I’ve been asked to forgive, & I’ve given that forgiveness to the best of my ability, I’d be less than honest if I didn’t say I still struggle with it. As Paul said, “I die daily.”

There’s no greater passage in the entire Bible that opens the heart of God on forgiveness than the narrative in Matthew chapter eighteen. I’m sure you’re familiar with it.

Even the disciples were having a hard time with forgiveness, so Peter came out & laid the difficulty of it right at the feet of Jesus. The Rabbinic teaching of the day said you should forgive someone up to three times & after that you could stop forgiving. To be on the safe side Peter doubled that & added one for magnanimity's sake. He asked, “Lord when somebody messes me over, how many times should I allow that to happen before I stop forgiving them? Seven times?”

Jesus said, “No, Not seven times. Seventy times seven.” We’d be missing the point here if we think Jesus was talking about a literal number. Jesus was actually talking here about how grace should operate in the life of the believer when it comes to the difficulty of forgiveness.

So Jesus told a simple, crystal-clear, scintillating parable & explained the issue of forgiveness to His disciples as well as you & me. We don’t have to be rocket scientists, bible scholars or great theologians to get the point of this parable.

It’s a story about a king & his servant. The king has loaned his servant money & decides to call in the loan. It’s pay-back time. Servant A is the first man we meet. He has run up a whopping tab, roughly 12 million dollars. The point is, it’s such a vast sum it’s impossible to pay back. The servant is unable to pay so the king took the next step & ordered the servant & his wife & children to be sold into slavery & his entire estate to be put on the auction block. At least the king can salvage a little bit of money on this deal.

But the servant begins to beg for mercy. He’s trying to buy time. He’s hoping the king will cut him some slack. He literally pleads for his life. Then the most unexpected thing happens; like a bolt from the blue the king totally forgives & cancels the entire debt. Suddenly servant, wife, children, & estate are off the auction block.

Now put yourself in that servant’s shoes. How would you be feeling at that moment? When somebody gives you a break in traffic aren’t you more likely then to give someone else a break? But after all that forgiveness, -servant A leaves as if nothing good has happened.

Enter servant B. Servant B owes servant A about $1.80 in today’s money. Like a scene from The Godfather, servant A says to servant B, “I’m going to remove your kneecaps unless you pay up.” Servant A shows servant B no mercy, instead he has servant B thrown into prison. We can agree that servant A is a jerk.

But there are always other eyes watching & someone went & told the king the whole story. Now for the second time servant A is called before the king. The king has another turn-around & this time his pity has turned to anger. He lowers the boom on servant A & throws him in prison.

The story is over for servant A & B but it’s not over for Peter & it’s not over for you & me. Jesus says, -- “Unless you & I forgive our brothers & sisters from the heart we’re going to wind up just like servant A.” And, oh, how God has forgiven the debt that you & I have run up. It’s far greater than 12 million dollars. The results of the tab are eternal death & separation from God in hell.

GOD IS EXTREMELY OBSESSIVE ABOUT FORGIVENESS

God is so obsessive that He mandates & orders forgiveness & just like any other scriptural mandate it’s for our own good. God knows that you & I will never be able to move toward wholeness, live victoriously & be healed until we let go of resentment, give up on revenge, & let Him take the quills out we’ve collected over the years.

The mistake we make is to look at the person who has wronged us & what they’ve done to us. This parable reminds us that’s a mistake. We need to look at who God is & what He’s done for us. There are no limits to forgiveness because there’s no limit to God’s grace.

The following is nothing new to most Christians but I have a feeling if we really took it seriously it would change the way we view the Lord’s Prayer.

Right in the middle of the Lord’s Prayer is a phrase that you & I, if we’re not careful will pray mindlessly. “Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.” Have we honestly thought about what we’re asking God to do here? Have you ever felt like falling silent at this point? We’re asking God to forgive us, to treat us --exactly the way we deal with other folks who’ve wronged us.

THE MOST PROFOUND, PUREST, HIGHEST, & FINEST EXAMPLE OF FORGIVENESS IN THE BIBLE HAPPENED WHEN JESUS HUNG ON THE CROSS.

He was condemned to death by evil men who plotted against him & produced lying witness to convict Him. As He surveyed the howling mob cheering His suffering, the man who knew no sin, the only innocent man who ever walked this sin cursed planet uttered the words that still ring across the centuries; “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” [Luke 23:34] Those 11 tortured words sweep away all our nonsensical excuses & reveal the barrenness of our hearts. They rip the cover off our unrighteous unforgiveness & show it for what it is.

Many of us say, “If only the people who hurt me would show some remorse, some sorrow, then maybe I would forgive them.” But consider Jesus on the cross. No one seemed sorry, quite the contrary-- they laughed, mocked & jeered Him. They hurled insults at Him. The people who killed Him were pleased with themselves. Pilate washed his hands of the whole sordid affair. The Jewish leaders hated Him with a fierce irrational hatred. They were happy to see Him suffer & die.

Evil was in the air that day. The forces of darkness had done their work & Jesus would soon be in a tomb. No one said, “I was wrong, this is a mistake.” And yet He said, “Father forgive them for they don’t know what they are doing,” --this is precisely what we must say to the quill throwers; the people who hurt us deliberately & repeatedly.

We must say it to those who intentionally attack us.

We must say it to those who casually & thoughtlessly wound us.

We must say it to those closest to us, to our husband or wife, to our children, to our parents, to our friends, to our neighbors, to our brothers & sisters.


“Father, forgive them” is what we must say if we want to follow Christ.


Blessings,


John

Love Will Keep Us Together

By John Stallings

It had been more than 500 years since they laid old Jacob to rest in the cave of Machpelah.

These were eventful years for Jacob’s descendants. There were the hard years of Egyptian bondage culminated by God’s gracious deliverance, and the forty years of wilderness wanderings culminated by the great conquest of Canaan. Then there were the strange years of sin, servitude, and salvation - the period of the Judges.

That gloomy era provides the backdrop for perhaps the most beautiful love story in the Bible, the story of Ruth and Boaz.

“Now it came about in the days when the judges governed, that there was a famine in the land. And a certain man of Bethlehem in Judah went to sojourn in the land of Moab with his wife and his two sons” [Ruth 1:1].

That man, named Elimelech, died in Moab, leaving his wife, Naomi, and their two sons, Mahlon and Chileon. The boys married Moabite women, and then, in what seemed to be a tragic twist of fate, both of them died, leaving Naomi in a strange land with only her two Moabite daughters-in-law, Ruth and Orpah.

When Naomi heard that God had prospered her people back in Bethlehem with food, she decided to return home.

Orpah remained in Moab but Ruth wouldn't  hear of it. She was one of those rare persons who loved deeply and selflessly, and she loved her mother-in-law. Her now famous words were-

For where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God” (Ruth 1:16). Her God was about to direct her to a wonderful man with whom she would be united.

THOSE “PESKY” MOTHER-INLAWS

I think it of interest to point out here-as if we weren’t already aware of it- that many a woman who loves her husband can’t seem to love his mother. And men seem to have the same problem with their wives’ mothers. Just reflect on all the mother-in-law jokes that have circulated through the years. Where does love like Ruth’s come from? It comes from the “Lord of all Love.”

If you want that kind of love in your life, you’ll have to cultivate a close personal relationship with Him just as Ruth did. We human beings are among other things, “great reflectors.” Our attitudes and dispositions will reflect who and what we spend the most time with. It would be futile to tell folk we spend an appreciable amount of time with God if we’re fractious and unloving. When we get to know God and understand how much He gave for us, we are encouraged to give of ourselves for the good of others, even our in-laws, and maybe even our “Outlaws and By-laws.” When we do that, tension and turmoil begin to dissolve into harmony and happiness.

NEVER TOO EARLY

It’s never too soon to learn these lessons of love. We should begin teaching them to our children very early in their lives. The training ground for love is the home. A loving relationship with parents and brothers and sisters will prepare them to love their mates and their mates’ parents as they should. If a person comes from an unloving home it’s difficult for them to give or to receive love. Children will not know how to love when they marry unless they show love to those with whom they live right now.

But it all begins with our love affair with the Lord. When we have experienced the love of God, we will express it in our family relationships—parents, brothers, sisters, husbands, wives, children, and in-laws. Ruth is ready for a beautiful love affair with Boaz because she is in love with her Lord and that love is spilling out to others in her life.

The first thing that strikes us about these two whom God brought together by His grace is their spiritual preparation. Although Elimelech’s family was out of the center of God’s will and out of the place of God’s blessing, they did accomplish something worthwhile. Through their testimony, this young Moabite named Ruth turned from worshiping Chemosh, the God of the Moabites, with all the abominable practices associated with his worship, and put her trust in the one true and living God. “Your God shall be my God,” she boldly declared. And it was evident to all who knew her that she had come to enjoy an intimate relationship with the Lord God of Israel.

Sometime later, Boaz would say to her, “May the Lord reward your work, and your wages be full from the Lord, the God of Israel, under whose wings you have come to seek refuge” [Ruth 2:12]. Her trust in God and her love for God were the sources of an inner strength and beauty that could not be hidden and of a love for others that could not be suppressed.

Consider what Ruth did. Instead of brooding over the loss of her own husband, she devoted herself to meeting the needs of her mother-in-law, to filling the void in Naomi’s life, to helping her the best she could. That meant leaving her home, her family, and her friends, moving to another land as a despised foreigner and living in poverty and privation. And for what? Love and concern for her mother-in-law were her only apparent motives. Boaz pointed that out later in the story:

“All that you have done for your mother-in-law after the death of your husband has been fully reported to me, and how you left your father and your mother and the land of your birth, and came to a people that you did not previously know” (Ruth 2:11).

PRINCE CHARMING APPEARS

Now let’s meet the Prince Charming in Ruth’s future. The story implies that Boaz is much older than she [Ruth 3:10]. We don’t know whether he was a bachelor or a widower, but we do know that he was a man of God. The Lord was an important part of his daily life. He thought often about the Lord, spoke freely of Him. Without question Boaz made the Lord part of his everyday business dealings.

Listen to him greet his reapers in the field. “May the Lord be with you,” he said. And they responded, “May the Lord bless you” [Ruth 2:4]. To Ruth he declared, “May you be blessed of the Lord, my daughter” [Ruth 3:10]. And again, “I will redeem you, as the Lord lives” [Ruth 3:13]. All the people who attended his wedding acknowledged his dependence upon God for his future posterity: “May the Lord make the woman who is coming into your home like Rachel and Leah, both of whom built the house of Israel” [Ruth 4:11].

The first requirement for a successful marriage is that the husband recognizes God in the equation. One reason so many marriages are floundering is because the husbands aren’t prepared spiritually for their task. They spent little or no time studying the Word, memorizing it, discovering how it applied to their lives, and learning from it what their responsibilities as Christian husbands and fathers would be. The Lord was not part of their daily living. And when they walked to the altar they were still spiritual babies, ill-prepared to assume the spiritual leadership of their homes. It’s no surprise that their marriages are in trouble.

IT’S NEVER TOO LATE TO CHANGE

Men, if you have wasted the years until now, there is no time to lose. Start cultivating a personal walk with Jesus Christ. Spend time regularly studying the Scriptures and learning from them how God wants you to live your life and discharge your responsibilities. Begin consulting Him about everything. If you are involved in an unhappy marital situation, the damage can be repaired, but the place to begin is with this matter of daily involvement with God. Other efforts will fail until our hearts are right with Him and we are growing in His likeness.

Let me stop here for a moment and explain the preceding few words. Someone might say, “Well brother, I’ve known of marriages that lasted for over 60 years and neither of the individuals were Christians nor did they even own a Bible.” That might very well be so, but here’s the truth about marriages like that; if you check them out, you’ll find that though they weren’t Christians, they were, perhaps unknowingly, utilizing the skills and principles laid out for us in God’s Word for a successful marriage. The husband had to be a loving and respectful provider for his family and the wife had to be to some degree a respectful, loving and submitted wife. What a pity if such a thing were true that a couple would live lives circumspect enough to almost be Christians, but never having trusted Christ as their Lord and Savior. They’d have nothing to look forward to at the end but an eternity lost without God.

Obviously, spiritually Ruth and Boaz were both ready. So we turn from their spiritual preparation to their sterling courtship. Naomi and Ruth had now arrived in Bethlehem, and the problem facing them was how to find enough food to eat. Isn’t it enlightening that though we expect so much from life, the folk in most Bible stories are consumed with just getting enough food to stay alive?

God had made a gracious provision in the Mosaic Law for folk in their predicament. Farmers were not permitted to reap the corners of their grain fields nor gather the gleanings; they were to leave them for the poor, for foreigners, for widows and orphans [Lev. 19:9, 10; 23:22; Deut. 24:19].

Almost any way you look at it, Naomi and Ruth met those qualifications. They were poor widows and Ruth was a foreigner. Since Naomi was getting a little too old to work in the fields, Ruth asked if she might go and find the field of some kind man who would allow her to glean. Naomi gave her permission.

“So she departed and went and gleaned in the field after the reapers; and she happened to come to the portion of the field belonging to Boaz, who was of the family of Elimelech” (Ruth 2:3).

When I was a boy of eleven, I picked cotton one day for about an hour mostly just to see how it felt. I remember when they weighed my cotton bag, I’d picked eleven cents worth. Ladies and gentlemen, this type of field work “ain’t easy.” Stooping and bending all day long as Ruth did as she gathered the grain into her long flowing cloak, the burden getting heavier with each stalk she gleaned, and the sun beating down on her back in that semi-tropical climate had to be awful.

A few of the bigoted hometown folks were probably taunting her because of her foreign accent, and some of the men seemed to be trying to put their hands on her [Ruth 2:9]. Every impulse in Ruth’s body urged her to flee to the purple mountains of Moab which she could see in the distance. That was home; that was where she belonged. But with quiet courage, simple modesty, and total unselfishness, she carried on.

WOULD BOAZ NOTICE RUTH?

Will Boaz notice her? He did. “Whose young woman is this?” he asked his servant who was in charge of the reapers. “She is the young Moabite woman who returned with Naomi from the land of Moab,” he replied [Ruth 2:5, 6]. Boaz lost no time in doing some nice things for Ruth. He invited her to stay in his fields and glean as much as she wanted, and to drink freely from the water pitchers provided for his own workers.

Nowhere can I find that Ruth was a beautiful woman like Sarah, Rebekah, or Rachel. We do not know whether she was or not, but we do know that she had an inner beauty, a meek and quiet spirit, an unpretentious humility that made her one of the loveliest women in Scripture. She bowed low before Boaz in genuine gratitude and said, “Why have I found favor in your sight that you should take notice of me, since I am a foreigner?” [Ruth 2:10].

Her humility was evident again when she said, “You have comforted me and indeed have spoken kindly to your maidservant, though I am not like one of your maidservants” [Ruth 2:13]. There was nothing “put on” about this. It was real. And this genuine humility, this meek and quiet spirit is one of the most valuable assets a woman can have. Peter says it is of great value in God’s sight [1 Pet. 3:4]. It might be a good trait for Christian women to ask God to help them develop.

It looks as though Boaz is getting more interested in this lovely woman as the day goes on. At mealtime he invited her to join him and his reapers for lunch, and he made sure she was served all that she wanted. When she finished eating and got up to return to work, Boaz said to his servants,

“Let her glean even among the sheaves, and do not insult her. And also you shall purposely pull out for her some grain from the bundles and leave it that she may glean, and do not rebuke her” [Ruth 2:15, 16].

So Ruth continued to glean until evening. And when she beat out what she had gleaned, it was nearly a bushel of barley. It seems as though Boaz was a kind man, thoughtful, considerate, and gentle. There are not too many of them around anymore, judging from what many women are sharing with marriage counselors. Some men have the strange notion that kindness and gentleness are effeminate traits and they go out of their way to avoid them. Not at all! They are Christ-like traits. And Christ was a rugged man’s man. Surveys show that kindness and gentleness rank near the top of the characteristics women are looking for in a husband. They would be good traits for Christian men to ask God to help them develop.

It was time to make a move. And strangely enough, in that culture it was Ruth’s move. God gave another interesting law to the Jews that required a man to marry the childless widow of his dead brother. The first son born of that union would bear his brother’s name and inherit his brother’s property [Deut. 25:5-10; Lev. 25:23-28]. If no brother was available, a more distant relative might be asked to fulfill this duty. But the widow would have to let him know that he was acceptable to be her “goel,” as they called it, -her kinsman-redeemer and provider.

Naomi told Ruth exactly how to do that. Ruth listened carefully and carried out her instructions precisely. Boaz would be sleeping on the threshing floor that night to protect his grain from thieves. After he went to sleep; Ruth tiptoed in, uncovered his feet, and laid down. By this act she was requesting Boaz to become her goel. Needless to say, Boaz was somewhat startled when he rolled over in the middle of the night and realized there was a woman lying at his feet. “Who are you?” he asked. She answered, “I am Ruth your maid. So spread your covering over your maid, for you are a close relative” [Ruth 3:9]. Spreading his cloak over her would signify his willingness to become her protector and provider. His response was immediate:

“May you be blessed of the Lord, my daughter. You have shown your last kindness to be better than the first by not going after young men, whether poor or rich. And now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you whatever you ask, for all my people in the city know that you are a woman of excellence” (Ruth 3:10, 11).

THIS EPISODE ISN’T “X-RATED.”

It’s important to understand that there was nothing immoral in this episode. This procedure was the custom of the day, and the record emphasizes the purity of it. In the secluded darkness of the threshing room, Boaz could have gratified his human desires and no one but Ruth would have known. But he was a godly, moral, self-disciplined, Spirit-controlled man, and he kept his hands off. Scripture says that Ruth slept at his feet until morning (Ruth 3:14). Furthermore, Ruth had the reputation of being a woman of excellence (Ruth 3:11). She had physical drives like any other normal woman, but she learned to claim God’s grace and strength to hold those drives in check until marriage.

Boaz and Ruth both knew that God’s greatest blessing in marriage would require purity before marriage. Carelessness in this area would bring guilt, loss of self-respect, and suspicion. And it could leave scars on their souls that would make their adjustment to each other in marriage most difficult.

This is a vanishing viewpoint. Satan has brainwashed our society into believing premarital sex is perfectly acceptable. Our society is paying the price for promiscuity by unprecedented marital turmoil and innumerable broken homes with all the emotional trauma they bring. God’s way is always best!

Boaz and Ruth did it God’s way. We’re not surprised to see, finally, their successful marriage. Not a great deal is actually said about their relationship with each other after the wedding, but we may assume from what we have already learned about them that their marriage was richly blessed of God. Scripture does say, “So Boaz took Ruth, and she became his wife, and he went in to her. And the Lord enabled her to conceive, and she gave birth to a son” [Ruth 4:13].

The most unusual aspect of this story is the continuing role Naomi played in their lives from this point on. As a former mother-in-law, we would expect her to drop out of the picture, but Boaz and Ruth are too loving and caring to let that happen. When their baby was born, the women of Bethlehem said to Naomi,

“Blessed is the Lord who has not left you without a redeemer today, and may his name become famous in Israel. May he also be to you a restorer of life and a sustainer of your old age; for your daughter-in-law, who loves you and is better to you than seven sons, has given birth to him” [Ruth 4:14, 15].

Then Naomi took the baby and cared for him, and the neighbor women said, “A son has been born to Naomi!” [Ruth 4:17]. Imagine that! They all considered that baby to be Naomi’s own child, and Boaz and Ruth happily permitted it. Boaz continued to provide for Naomi until her death, and he seems to have done it cheerfully. And Ruth’s love for her never waned. The women called Ruth “‘your daughter-in-law, who loves you and is better to you than seven sons.”

Now that Ruth had her husband, she could have resented her former mother-in-law as an intruder. Many women would have. But when a person is filled with the love of God, his heart is big enough to engulf more than just one special person, or even a special few. He tenderly and unselfishly reaches out to meet the needs of others as well. It is striking to observe how God’s love in Ruth’s life overcame all obstacles—poverty, racial prejudice, age disparity, physical temptations, and even mother-in-law differences.

There’s a good possibility that God’s love can solve the problems in our lives. As we come to understand and enjoy His unconditional love for us, and allow that love to flow through us, we think less and less about ourselves and more and more about others.

The problem-solving potential of that self-sacrificing, self-giving love is phenomenal.

Incidentally, isn’t it wonderful to see how God was providentially moving Ruth into a very important position? She would be King David’s great-grandmother, consequentially making her part of the linage of the coming Christ.

Blessings,


John

Big Boy Christianity

By John Stallings

Like many of you, I was captured by grace at a very young age.

By the time I was six I realized that Jesus loved me & died on the cross to save me. So I gave Him my heart & life & was born into the family of God.

As you might expect, I had no spiritual vocabulary & no spiritual teeth. I didn’t understand all there was to know about Jesus & still don’t. If you’d put a gun on me I couldn’t have told you what repentance or faith was. I had received the spirit of adoption whereby I could cry Abba Father or  "Da-da" according to Romans 8:15, but that’s about it. I think I was pretty much a normal baby, spiritually & physically.

I remember my first “little man's” haircut & remember crying to get out of the barber chair. My kinfolk never let me forget that I was so scared all I could sobbingly say was “Feet on floor daddy, feet on floor.”Though my parents never said much about it, I can imagine the relief when I slowly began to grow up, though I also have a feeling it took quite a long time. One of the phrases I can remember hearing most from my childhood was “Johnny, be a big-boy.” Come on son, be a big-boy for daddy, or mommy.”

I can also remember that sentiment being impressed on me in non-verbal, somewhat painful ways that centered on the place where I sat down. One of the reasons a baby takes so much care is because in their world, it’s all about them & their needs. They’re always getting hurt, if not really hurt they’re getting their feelings hurt & they’re always making a mess for someone else to clean up. As much as we love our babies, we have to admit that in the home, if there’s a problem, it usually centers around the babies.

Have you ever noticed that the same is true in a church? You can count on spiritual babies to be at the center of just about every church disturbance. Acts chapter 15: 36-41 gives us a rare glimpse behind the scenes into the inner working of perhaps the greatest missionary team the Holy Spirit ever put together.This little glimpse into the lives of Paul & Barnabas shows the humanity yet spiritual maturity of the two men.

Paul needs no introduction anywhere because He’s without doubt one of the icons of Holy Writ. Barnabas however isn’t as well known but it’s good to remember that his name meant “Son of consolation” or “Encourager.” It’s rather special to be named after a gift of the spirit. i.e. Romans 12:8.Barnabas was responsible for over half the books of the New Testament. Paul wrote 13 of them, & Barnabas was the man who brought Paul to the brethren in Jerusalem. Acts 9:26-27. Mark wrote one & no doubt it was Barnabas who loved & encouraged him to continue in the faith. That’s 14, over half of the 27 books.

Have you ever heard the term “kinfolk’s complex?” The word we use today is nepotism. What both terms refer to is a prejudicial, biased leaning toward family. This problem is at the root of what’s happening in this story.On Paul & Barnabas’ first missionary trip together, John Mark the cousin of Barnabas accompanied them. Somewhere along the way John Mark decided to leave the team & return to his home in Jerusalem. We’re not told the reason for his departure however some have theorized the fires of resistance to the gospel were so hot, John Mark allowed fear to cause him to tuck-tail & run.When a second campaign was planned Barnabas suggests taking John Mark along as helper. Paul promptly nixed the idea. The scripture tells us that “sharp contention” developed between Barnabas & Paul over John Mark. Barnabas says he goes, Paul says he doesn’t go. They couldn’t agree so they split up.

As far as I’m able to discern, the two remarkable men never saw each other again.It’s impossible to read this drama & not be moved. The encouraging thing is the break-up didn’t come over doctrine. The rupture involved a personal dispute based on a judgment call. To their credit Paul nor Barnabas didn’t allow the conflict to distract them from their respective efforts of spreading the gospel. They were big-boys & exhibited “big-boy” maturity. Too often we can act like babies when we have a disagreement.If you ever raised kids you know the most glorious day was when the kids could sit at a table & feed themselves. We knew then they were becoming big boys & girls. I think God has the same feeling when He sees His kids growing up & not reacting to a speed-bump like it was a mountain.

THERE ARE TIMES WHEN SPIRITUAL MINDS & HEARTS WILL DISAGREE.

The important thing is to stay focused on the work of God. Because of the disagreement, Barnabas chose his cousin John Mark & they formed an evangelistic team. Paul chose Silas & both teams went on the road.Which team was most successful? As far as we know they were both equally successful. Some have said that Paul was just too stubborn in the matter. However we read in Acts 15:40 that the Church commended Paul & Silas, but no such commendation came for Barnabas & John Mark.Paul may have been motivated more by experience, cool logic & rationality, while Barnabas was guided by a kindred familiarity & a warm heart. Most of can relate to Barnabas and Mark here because we’ve all needed a second chance .

It’s interesting to note that later on Paul writes to Timothy & says,--Get Mark & bring him with you, for he is profitable to me in the ministry.—2 Tim.4:11. Sounds to me like "uncle Barney" got some vindication here.

We're looking here at a case of brass tacks Christian maturity. We are allowed to closely inspect how God’s choice men dealt with disagreements. Let’s look at some of the aspects of the way Paul & Barnabas settled their dispute & see what we might glean & utilize the next time we have a problem with a family member, Christian friend or worker.I think you’ll agree that 95% of our problems will be less than Paul & Barnabas’ situation so let’s see how we can disagree & still be like Jesus. Let’s see what “Big-Boy” Christianity is all about.

1. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE ALL THE INFORMATION BEFORE YOU DISAGREE.

We’ve looked closely at Paul & Barnabas’ problem & see the simple story; they disagreed over taking John Mark on this missionary trip. It’s all laid out rather simply for us don’t you agree?Proverbs 18:13 says,--he that answereth a matter before he hears it, it is folly & shame to him.

The following ad was placed in a newspaper,

“Wendell Walsh has a sewing machine for sale. It belongs to the lady who loves with him.—Ph. 359-4704 Address 67 Walnut street.”The next day the following ad appeared.—“Wendell Walsh no longer has a sewing machine for sale. I have smashed it. The owner did not love with me; she’s an elderly lady who lived in my upstairs apartment. Please don’t call 359-4704, it’s been disconnected. Please don’t go to 67 Walnut Street, I no longer live there.”What a mess, & all the confusion was caused by the mix-up of two letters, I & O.


So much pain is caused on a daily basis because someone got their facts wrong. You may remember the news story about a young woman in a beauty pageant who was crowned queen & as she walked around with the crown on her head the judges started comparing notes because they knew she wasn’t the one they voted # ONE. It was embarrassing for all concerned when they had to back-peddle & remove the crown from one woman’s head & place it on the real winners head, all because of a mistake in counting.

Paul Harvey told about one of the top national credit reporters who messed up a woman’s credit & it took her ten years to get them to clean up their mistake. After all those years of suffering the credit company finally found [admitted to] their problem & the woman was given millions in compensation, but not before wrecking her good name & her emotions in the process.It’s almost impossible to overstate the importance of having our facts straight before we allow our opinions to jell, especially when it’s something we are telling to others as the truth. There’ll be plenty of time to disagree, but first get the truth.

2. DON’T INFLATE THE IMPORTANCE OF ONE DISAGREEMENT.

Paul & Barnabas didn't over inflate the importance of the disagreement they had. How do I know that? As we’ve already stated, Paul & Barnabas had the love & grace to sit down, spread out a map & say, “You go here & I’ll go there.” Every battle isn’t Armageddon & it’s always wise to choose our battles.If you’re having a disagreement with someone, here are a few pointers that should help;

1. Check your motive. Is your problem a valid point or is it a personality problem.

2. Check your spiritual fruit. Love, joy, peace, etc.Don’t go into a disagreement until you know your love level is higher than the disagreement level.Read & reread 1 Corinthians 13.

3. Have you lifted this up to God in prayer? Prayer will set our hearts & minds right.

4. Have you searched the scriptures on this matter?—Do you know what the bible teaches about it?

5. If you disagree, don’t be disagreeable. Our positions don’t get us into trouble, our dispositions do.

3. ISOLATE THE TRUE ISSUE & STAY ON THE POINT. DON’T BROADEN THE AGENDA.

A couple [I’m sure all married folk have experienced this, I know I have] will be out driving & get into an argument over directions. Maybe the man will turn on the wrong street or make some other mistake the wife feels will put them off course. It’s important to remember it’s just that one corned not all corners for the rest of our lives.And it’s extremely important to remember that our mother-in-law has nothing to do with this corner.A couple can get into a disagreement over the wife spending money on clothes & & then she’ll say to the husband, “Well, you bought a new shotgun & you already had two guns.” Then the man might say, “I don’t like your old momma anyway.” Where did momma come from? Money, money, money, momma. Once it gets to this point old Satan has a heyday.

A person in church might come by the pastor & say, “I think the music was a little loud this morning. And while I’m at it, your tie was a little too flashy last Sunday.” I’ve seen this spirit get loose & go on to say, “And I don’t like your hair, your shoes, clothes, your car, house or kids.”You see what that is? It’s broadening the agenda.

I’m sure you know that a church of any size will have an agenda for their annual business meeting. The meeting has to be announced far enough in advance for all the folk to plan for it. Then the pastor & deacons will take all the business of the church & formulate an agenda for the meeting.As a rule after a certain time no new business will be intertained simply becaause if it wasn’t done this way, you’d have people getting up during the meeting & bringing up things that would lead the proceedings far a -field. Precious time would be wasted & people would leave all dazed & confused. Centuries of experience has taught that even the best of God’s people can get into strife if meetings like this aren’t conducted in a timely, planned & deliberate way.

Paul said,--Avoid foolish & unlearned questions for they gender strife. 2 Tim 2:23. We don’t see this happening with Paul & Barnabas. As far as we know they stayed on the one issue, worked it out & never moved out of peace.

4. LEARN HOW TO BE HONEST WITHOUT BEING BRUTAL.

In John 4:7-39, when Jesus sat down at the well & talked to the woman, he could have taken the truth & destroyed her with it. She’d had five husbands & was shacked up with one she wasn’t married to. If Jesus had thrown her past in her face, she’d have shriveled up but he didn’t. He could have said, “woman, don’t go telling people you’ve been talking to me,” but He didn’t. He allowed her to act as a messenger to go into her little town & tell the story of this man who’d told her all she’d ever done. Many people came out to see Jesus & became believers because of her testimony.

I heard about a lady who mastered the art of telling the truth without being brutal. Her husband told her one day, “Honey, I wish I could be smart, educated & handsome for you because you deserve that kind of husband.” She answered, “But I don’t want someone smart, educated & handsome, I want you.”

A young man told his dad he felt everybody in the world hated him. The dad said, “That’s silly son, everyone hasn’t met you yet.

If you watch the news at all you know that in our country, you can’t do things that appear brutal. Even if a person is caught mistreating a dog or cat, they are prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Human nature recoils if we see a human being or animal being treated unfairly. Though I love the animals & believe in treating them with kindness, I have a problem with the fact that we can kill unborn babies with fewer problems than we have when cats & dogs are mistreated. But "don’t be cruel" is always a good motto.We shouldn’t make statements like; “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard,” or “you’re as strong as an Ox & almost as smart,” or “honey, I wish you’d lose a little weight, when you walk in front of the TV we miss three episodes.” It’s much better to learn to say; “I may be wrong but here’s what I think.”

5. NEVER BREAK YOUR PLOW OVER A STUMP!

This is a very “old school” illustration that comes from the farming culture. My father was raised on a South Georgia farm & he shared many philosophies with me that originated on “dirt poor” farms.My grandfather used to teach his sons that some of the richest soil had stumps growing in it. What the farmer had to do was plow around the stumps instead of hitting them with his relativity fragile plow. This might seem like a no-brainer because anyone can see how unwise it would be to intentionally use a light plow on an entrenched & sturdy stump. The stumps were deeply embedded & rock solid. If a farmer tried to pull one of them up with his plow he’d not only tear- up his plow but He’d break down the horse or mule pulling the plow. So the farmer would simply plow around stumps.

There will be “stumps” growing in every field we’ll ever work in be it the ministry or a secular business. These stumps will be of the human variety. They aren’t of themselves demonic, but Satan sets them in your path trying to get you to do or say something you’ll regret. It might be a kindly old aunt, grandmother, mother-in-law, boss, neighbor or any other person “planted” in your field.I remember in the first church I pastored there was a “stump” in the form of a little old lady who’d been in the church for fifty years. She was against me from the day I arrived in town & she’d sit in the congregation & glare at me when I preached. Looking back she was the best friend I ever had because at least I always knew where she stood & she kept me sharp. I would study and pray an extra hour just with sister……in mind. I knew she was looking for any mistake I might make & she’d trumpet it to the high heavens.

I challenge you to look at your life & pin-point the stumps in your “field.” Again, they aren’t necessarily Satanic, they may be some of best folk you’ll ever meet, but God has chosen to use them to challenge, chisel, sand-paper, test your patience & polish you up.We should remember that the more serious the issue, the higher our love level must be.

Paul took the time to totally expound on love in 1 Corinthians 13. He not only tells us what love is, he tells us what love isn’t. Everything you & I do & say must be filtered through that chapter & everything good we might accomplish, even if it’s being burned at the stake, If it’s not done in love, it won't count.If you need another proof-text to show if you’re dealing in love or if others are dealing with you in love, apply James’ test;

But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be entreated, full of mercy and good fruits without partiality, and without hypocrisy.-James 3:17

If we’re going to have any friends, hold a job long or live in anything closely resembling peace & happiness, we’ll all have to plow around a stump now & then. But some gorgeous & nutritious crops are grown in some awfully stump-filled farm land.

6. IF YOU HAVE A DISAGREEMENT WITH SOMEONE, AND IT TURNS INTO A POINT OF SEPARATION, MAYBE NOBODY WAS WRONG. MAYBE A SEPARATION IS GOOD EVEN IN GOD’S EYES.

The bible doesn’t say Paul & Barnabas were at odds about everything & on every point for life; they just had a difference of opinion on one point. Obviously God blessed both these ministering teams.Paul didn’t write poison-pen letters to the churches against Barnabas. Barnabas didn’t send letters saying “Don’t listen to Paul. I know him & he’s a scoundrel.” They just split up “and the church rolled on.”

Some churches like to Baptize by totally dunking the individual & that seems to me to be the bible way. But when you think about it, others want to sprinkle them with water. Some want to baptize folk back ways, front ways or sideways. There was such as drought in Georgia recently the Baptists were sprinkling, the Methodist’s & Episcopals were spraying from a bottle & the Catholics were offering handiwipes. Maybe I’m wrong but it seems to me whether we squirt-em, spray-em, sprinkle-em or dunk-em, we should find a way to meet in the middle because in the final analysis, we’re all heading for the same heaven.

WHAT IS ‘BIG-BOY’ CHRISTIANITY? IT’S LOOKING FOR THINGS WE CAN AGREE ON & AS MUCH AS IS POSSIBLE, LIVING PEACEFULLY.

Let me tell you about the biggest baby in the bible.We find him in Jonah 4:1-11. Jonah was furious. He lost his temper. He yelled at God, “God! I knew it-when I was back home, I knew this was going to happen! That’s why I ran off to Tarshish! I knew you were sheer grace and mercy, not easily angered, rich in love, and ready at the drop of a hat to turn your plans of punishment into a program of forgiveness!So, God, if you won’t kill them, kill me! I’m better off dead!”God said, “What do you have to be angry about?”

But Jonah just left. He went out of the city to the east and sat down in a sulk. He put together a makeshift shelter of leafy branches and sat there in the shade to see what would happen to the city.God arranged for a broad-leafed tree to spring up. It grew over Jonah to cool him off and get him out of his angry sulk. Jonah was pleased and enjoyed the shade. Life was looking up.But then God sent a worm.

By the dawn of the next day, the worm had bored into the shade tree and it withered away. The sun beat down on Jonah’s head and he started to faint. He prayed to die: “I’m better off dead!”Then God said to Jonah, “What right do you have to get angry about this shade tree?”Jonah said, “Plenty of right. It’s made me angry enough to die.”God said, “What’s this? How is it that you can change your feelings from pleasure to anger overnight about a mere shade tree that you did nothing to get? You neither planter or watered it. It grew up one night and died the next night. So, why can’t I likewise change what I feel about Nineveh from anger to pleasure, this big city of more than 120,000 childlike people who don’t yet know right from wrong, to say nothing of all the innocent animals?”

This big baby named Jonah was mad at God for blessing & forgiving the people he’d preached to.

What a contrast to the words of Jesus on the cross;

“Father, forgive them, they know not what they do."


Jonah---Not a very BIG-BOY!!


BLESSINGS,


John